{"id":15253,"date":"2023-03-09T20:00:47","date_gmt":"2023-03-10T04:00:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/?p=15253"},"modified":"2023-12-20T22:33:52","modified_gmt":"2023-12-21T06:33:52","slug":"ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Ways to Fix a Sexless Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>If you\u2019re anything like me you love feeling desired, and when the physical passion in your relationship is missing or rare, it makes you feel undesirable, which feels awful.<\/p>\n<p>Then you wonder if it\u2019s because of the extra pounds or wrinkles turning him off. Or maybe because there\u2019s something wrong with him that he\u2019s not interested anymore.<\/p>\n<p>Either way, it\u2019s lonely, painful and confusing. But it doesn\u2019t have to stay stuck that way.<\/p>\n<p>Here are five ways to fix your sexless marriage:<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_39 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-transparent ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\">Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#1_Use_the_best_aphrodisiac_on_the_planet_for_men\" title=\"Use the best aphrodisiac on the planet for men.\">Use the best aphrodisiac on the planet for men.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#2_Make_a_list_of_all_the_things_youre_grateful_for_about_your_husband\" title=\"Make a list of all the things you\u2019re grateful for about your husband.\">Make a list of all the things you\u2019re grateful for about your husband.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#3_Start_expressing_that_appreciation_to_your_husband\" title=\"Start expressing that appreciation to your husband.\">Start expressing that appreciation to your husband.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#4_Stop_pushing_for_sex\" title=\"Stop pushing for sex.\">Stop pushing for sex.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#5_Find_your_happiness_by_treating_yourself_well\" title=\"Find your happiness by treating yourself well.\">Find your happiness by treating yourself well.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_Use_the_best_aphrodisiac_on_the_planet_for_men\"><\/span>1. Use the best aphrodisiac on the planet for men.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15262 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/respect-your-husband.jpg\" alt=\"Respect Your Husband\" width=\"800\" height=\"337\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/respect-your-husband.jpg 800w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/respect-your-husband-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/respect-your-husband-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/respect-your-husband-768x324.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Yes, there is an aphrodisiac for men, and most women either don\u2019t know about it or don\u2019t know what it means, just like I didn\u2019t know either in the bad old days.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s respect.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Respect means you expect the best outcome from him, not the worst.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>It means apologizing that you didn\u2019t trust his thinking or told him what to do at work or how to be a dad.<\/p>\n<p>And if you\u2019re thinking you don\u2019t <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-respect-your-husband\/\">respect your husband<\/a> right now because of all the ways he\u2019s disappointed you, then you have tremendous power to break the logjam by deciding to respect him again.<\/p>\n<p>How do you do that? That leads to the second way to fix a sexless marriage\u2026<\/p>\n<div class=\"laura-six-intimacy-skills\" id=\"laura-3804967921\"><blockquote>\n<h3 style=\"display: inline; font-size: 23px;\">Related Article:<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/six-intimacy-skills\/\">The Number One Most Indispensable Skill for Fixing Your Marriage Fast.<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_Make_a_list_of_all_the_things_youre_grateful_for_about_your_husband\"><\/span>2. Make a list of all the things you\u2019re grateful for about your husband.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15263\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/be-grateful.jpg\" alt=\"Be Grateful\" width=\"800\" height=\"337\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/be-grateful.jpg 800w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/be-grateful-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/be-grateful-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/be-grateful-768x324.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>List 20 or so things about him. If you can\u2019t think of anything right now because you\u2019re feeling so resentful, that\u2019s a very hard and heavy place to be.<\/p>\n<p>I invite you to really get creative and think of at least three things, even though there are many things you wish he would do differently.<\/p>\n<p>Because the third way to fix a <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/husband-not-affectionate\/\">sexless marriage<\/a> is to\u2026<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_Start_expressing_that_appreciation_to_your_husband\"><\/span>3. Start expressing that appreciation to your husband.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15264\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/thankful-for-husband.jpg\" alt=\"Say thank you to your husband\" width=\"800\" height=\"336\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/thankful-for-husband.jpg 800w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/thankful-for-husband-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/thankful-for-husband-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/thankful-for-husband-768x323.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Thank him out loud or by text at least three times a day.<\/p><div class=\"laura-new-roadmap\" id=\"laura-596706303\"><p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<!--HubSpot Call-to-Action Code --><span class=\"hs-cta-wrapper\" id=\"hs-cta-wrapper-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><span class=\"hs-cta-node hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" id=\"hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><!--[if lte IE 8]>\n\n<div id=\"hs-cta-ie-element\"><\/div>\n\n<![endif]--><a href=\"https:\/\/cta-redirect.hubspot.com\/cta\/redirect\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" ><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"hs-cta-img\" id=\"hs-cta-img-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" style=\"border-width:0px;\" src=\"https:\/\/no-cache.hubspot.com\/cta\/default\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969.png\"  alt=\"Free Webinar\"\/><\/a><\/span><script charset=\"utf-8\" src=\"https:\/\/js.hscta.net\/cta\/current.js\"><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\"> hbspt.cta.load(21708589, '72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969', {\"useNewLoader\":\"true\",\"region\":\"na1\"}); <\/script><\/span><!-- end HubSpot Call-to-Action Code -->\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>I\u2019m talking about <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/podcast\/051-the-most-powerful-intimacy-skill\/\">expressing sincere gratitude<\/a> that he takes the trash out or makes dinner or went to the store to get watermelon.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4_Stop_pushing_for_sex\"><\/span>4. Stop pushing for sex.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15265\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/flirt-for-sex.jpg\" alt=\"Flirt for Sex\" width=\"800\" height=\"337\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/flirt-for-sex.jpg 800w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/flirt-for-sex-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/flirt-for-sex-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/flirt-for-sex-768x324.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Be receptive instead of aggressive. So instead of saying, like I used to, \u201cWe should have sex,\u201d you might be flirty and flash him or jump in the shower with him or talk about how amorous you\u2019re feeling\u00a0.<\/p>\n<p>But you\u2019ll want to do that without expectation because <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/give-up-control\/\">control is not attractive<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>How do you lose that expectation if it already feels like a herd of elephants in the room?<\/p>\n<p>Glad you asked! In my experience, it all comes down to this\u2026<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5_Find_your_happiness_by_treating_yourself_well\"><\/span>5. Find your happiness by treating yourself well.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15269\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/happy-wife-is-sexy.jpg\" alt=\"Happy Wife is Sexy\" width=\"800\" height=\"337\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/happy-wife-is-sexy.jpg 800w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/happy-wife-is-sexy-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/happy-wife-is-sexy-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/happy-wife-is-sexy-768x324.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Only you know what that means for you. It could be a bubble bath, but it might be a jujitsu class. It could be getting your nails done, or it might be getting your hands dirty growing vegetables. Maybe it\u2019s playing with your pets or tickling the ivories. It could be watching a rom-com or talking to a tree.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019re tempted to skip this step, well, you\u2019re not alone. Most students want to skip this step and get right to the part where they say or do the thing that will make their husbands desire them. But this is that step\u00a0!<\/p>\n<p>In my experience, nothing is as appealing to a husband as a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.foxnews.com\/health\/stressful-marriage-harm-heart-health-study\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">happy, smiling wife<\/a> who respects him.<\/p>\n<p>Which steps will you try today so you can start feeling desired?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If you\u2019re anything like me you love feeling desired, and when the physical passion in your relationship is missing or rare, it makes you feel undesirable, which feels awful. Then you wonder if it\u2019s because of the extra pounds or wrinkles turning him off. Or maybe because there\u2019s something wrong with him that he\u2019s not\u2026 <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/\">Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15268,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_stopmodifiedupdate":false,"_modified_date":"","content-type":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[716],"tags":[],"app":[],"class_list":["post-15253","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-life-and-physical-intimacy"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>5 Ways to Fix a Sexless Marriage<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"5 Ways to Fix a Sexless Marriage\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"If you\u2019re anything like me you love feeling desired, and when the physical passion in your relationship is missing or rare, it makes you feel undesirable, which feels awful. Then you wonder if it\u2019s because of the extra pounds or wrinkles turning him off. Or maybe because there\u2019s something wrong with him that he\u2019s not\u2026 Read More &raquo;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Laura Doyle Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-03-10T04:00:47+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-12-21T06:33:52+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"628\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Laura Doyle\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"headline\":\"5 Ways to Fix a Sexless Marriage\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-03-10T04:00:47+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-12-21T06:33:52+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/\"},\"wordCount\":585,\"commentCount\":8,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/ways-to-fix-a-sexless-marriage.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Sex Life &amp; 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I'm Laura. New York Times Bestselling Author I was the perfect wife--until I actually got married. When I tried to tell my husband how to be more romantic, more ambitious, and tidier, he avoided me. I dragged him to marriage counseling and nearly divorced him. I then started talking to women who had what I wanted in their marriages and that\u2019s when I got my miracle. The man who wooed me returned. I wrote a few books about what I learned and accidentally started a worldwide movement of women who practice The Six Intimacy Skills\u2122 that lead to having amazing, vibrant relationships. 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