{"id":15372,"date":"2023-05-17T14:55:12","date_gmt":"2023-05-17T21:55:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/?p=15372"},"modified":"2023-05-27T14:55:34","modified_gmt":"2023-05-27T21:55:34","slug":"3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Signs the Relationship Is Over for Him"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When you\u2019re wondering whether the relationship is over for him, it\u2019s because you&#8217;re worried that you\u2019re going to be left. You\u2019re scared that you\u2019re going to be abandoned and you want to know the future so you can prepare and somehow soften the blow to your heart.<\/p>\n<p>If you just knew one way or the other, you could cut your losses and stop wasting your energy. Being able to see ahead to the future seems like it will be a salve, something to be able to make plans for your life around. So it\u2019s only natural that you would look to what he\u2019s doing to find out.<\/p>\n<p>Is this relationship going to end? What are the signs?<\/p>\n<p>But an even more interesting question is: What are your intentions for this relationship?<\/p>\n<p>Because that matters. A lot!<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s say, for example, you\u2019ve experienced sign number one:<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_39 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-transparent ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\">Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him\/#1_He_Says_Its_Over\" title=\"He Says It\u2019s Over\">He Says It\u2019s Over<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him\/#2_He_Files_for_Divorce\" title=\"He Files for Divorce\">He Files for Divorce<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him\/#3_Hes_Paying_More_Attention_to_Someone_Else\" title=\"He\u2019s Paying More Attention to Someone Else\">He\u2019s Paying More Attention to Someone Else<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_He_Says_Its_Over\"><\/span>1. He Says It\u2019s Over<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15418\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Respect in a Relationship\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/being-respecful-in-a-relationship-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>This is a terrifying sign that your relationship might be ending. It\u2019s devastating to hear those words, which seem like a pretty unequivocal message that he\u2019s done.<\/p>\n<p>But is it really over when he says that?<\/p>\n<p>Could be. Or it could be his way of saying, \u201cI\u2019m not getting what I need in this relationship and that needs to change, but I\u2019m afraid it\u2019s not going to.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>If he hasn\u2019t been getting what he needs in the marriage, that means you probably haven\u2019t either.<\/p>\n<p>But what was it that he needed and didn\u2019t get?<\/p>\n<p>My first guess would be <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC1852924\/\">respect<\/a>. And that\u2019s because nobody ever showed you what respect actually looks like, even though you probably heard plenty of times, just like I did, that you SHOULD be respectful.<\/p>\n<p>That isn\u2019t enough, in my experience.<\/p><div class=\"laura-new-roadmap\" id=\"laura-2582768036\"><p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<!--HubSpot Call-to-Action Code --><span class=\"hs-cta-wrapper\" id=\"hs-cta-wrapper-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><span class=\"hs-cta-node hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" id=\"hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><!--[if lte IE 8]>\n\n<div id=\"hs-cta-ie-element\"><\/div>\n\n<![endif]--><a href=\"https:\/\/cta-redirect.hubspot.com\/cta\/redirect\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" ><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"hs-cta-img\" id=\"hs-cta-img-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" style=\"border-width:0px;\" src=\"https:\/\/no-cache.hubspot.com\/cta\/default\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969.png\"  alt=\"Free Webinar\"\/><\/a><\/span><script charset=\"utf-8\" src=\"https:\/\/js.hscta.net\/cta\/current.js\"><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\"> hbspt.cta.load(21708589, '72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969', {\"useNewLoader\":\"true\",\"region\":\"na1\"}); <\/script><\/span><!-- end HubSpot Call-to-Action Code -->\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>I needed to know what that meant and why I would want to be respectful, what was in it for me. Turns out there\u2019s dignity in being respectful, and there\u2019s calm and confidence. I feel like my best self when I\u2019m respectful.<\/p>\n<p>Plus, my husband gets the oxygen he needs. When I say oxygen, I mean respect.<\/p>\n<p>So why be respectful to your husband when <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-get-your-husband-back\/\">he says the relationship is over<\/a>? What is there to respect about that?<\/p>\n<p>Maybe it\u2019s more about you and how you want to show up in this situation. Would you like to show up with dignity and calm and be your best self?<\/p>\n<p>If you have been unwittingly depriving your husband of oxygen, then <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-respect-your-husband\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">restoring that respect<\/span><\/a> might just be the key to making your marriage last, even if he\u2019s saying it\u2019s over.<\/p>\n<div class=\"laura-six-intimacy-skills\" id=\"laura-3725874413\"><blockquote>\n<h3 style=\"display: inline; font-size: 23px;\">Related Article:<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/six-intimacy-skills\/\">The Number One Most Indispensable Skill for Fixing Your Marriage Fast.<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_He_Files_for_Divorce\"><\/span>2. He Files for Divorce<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15419\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce.jpg\" alt=\"Husband Filed for Divorce\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/husband-filed-for-divorce-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>You might think that your husband filing for divorce is a sign that the relationship is over for him. I can see why you would think that. Nothing says \u201cI\u2019m serious about ending this relationship\u201d like divorce papers.<\/p>\n<p>But I\u2019ve seen so many marriages turn around after the divorce papers are filed that I no longer see it as the death knell for a marriage. I think of it as a wake-up call. It\u2019s his way of saying \u201cI\u2019m not happy and I can\u2019t make you happy. And we both deserve to be happy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Many women find our campus after he\u2019s filed for divorce and then\u2026they start to get happy. What if that was all he ever wanted? For you to become happy.<\/p>\n<p>I know it sounds contrary when you\u2019re going through something so painful, scary and hard. But what I see all the time is that women who get the <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/six-intimacy-skills\/\">Six Intimacy Skills\u2122<\/a> and the <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Connection Framework<\/span><\/a> create their own miracles, even after he has filed for divorce.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes the divorce proceedings are stopped and the marriage is renewed. Sometimes the divorce goes through, then the couple gets remarried.<\/p>\n<p>That was <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/podcast\/055-how-to-save-your-marriage-when-he-wont-even-try\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Christy\u2019s story<\/span><\/a>. She didn\u2019t let the divorce being finalized mean that the relationship was over.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_Hes_Paying_More_Attention_to_Someone_Else\"><\/span>3. He\u2019s Paying More Attention to Someone Else<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15420\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last.jpg\" alt=\"Making Your Marriage Last\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/making-your-marriage-last-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>What if your husband is spending more time, giving more energy and <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/my-husband-is-nicer-to-other-women\/\">connecting more with someone else<\/a> than he is with you? Isn\u2019t that a sign that the relationship with you is over?<\/p>\n<p>It can be if you want to make it that. If you want to focus on that and give the other woman your energy, that will increase her presence in your life, in my experience. And it can be very, very tempting to focus on her, more tempting than a Cinnabon.<\/p>\n<p>But there\u2019s <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">someone else who desperately needs your focus<\/span> right now, and that\u2019s you. How are you feeling? What do you want? And how can you give yourself that today? Those are some of the most important questions to ask yourself if you want your marriage to last and thrive.<\/p>\n<p>And I know you do, because you wouldn\u2019t be reading right now if you didn\u2019t. You\u2019re investing in your marriage right now by reading.<\/p>\n<p>Making your marriage last and thrive is so important. It can take a lot of courage and commitment. So here\u2019s to you finding the answers and the questions that serve your mission to end world divorce, starting with your own.<\/p>\n<p>I admire that.<\/p>\n<p>Now that you have the keys to <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-save-a-marriage-when-only-one-is-trying\/\">save your marriage<\/a>\u2014restoring respect, getting happy and choosing your focus\u2014which will you try first?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When you\u2019re wondering whether the relationship is over for him, it\u2019s because you&#8217;re worried that you\u2019re going to be left. You\u2019re scared that you\u2019re going to be abandoned and you want to know the future so you can prepare and somehow soften the blow to your heart. If you just knew one way or the\u2026 <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/3-signs-the-relationship-is-over-for-him\/\">Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15417,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_stopmodifiedupdate":false,"_modified_date":"","content-type":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[709],"tags":[],"app":[],"class_list":["post-15372","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-divorce-and-separation"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>3 Signs the Relationship Is Over for Him<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Do you think your marriage or relationship is over for him? 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