{"id":15519,"date":"2023-07-04T02:00:50","date_gmt":"2023-07-04T09:00:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/?p=15519"},"modified":"2023-07-04T02:00:41","modified_gmt":"2023-07-04T09:00:41","slug":"why-does-my-husband-watch-porn","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Does My Husband Watch Porn"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When you discover that your husband watches porn, it can feel really bad, <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/disrespect-in-marriage\/\">disrespectful<\/a> even. Here you\u2019re his only partner in the bedroom, but he\u2019s watching other women do nasty things on his phone. It\u2019s so disappointing, and so revolting.<\/p>\n<p>It can also make you feel pretty unspecial knowing that your husband watches an endless parade of strange women on the Internet. You wonder if he\u2019s even a decent, moral person. Maybe he\u2019s addicted to porn. And if he\u2019s watching porn but not having physical intimacy with you, then it can feel like porn is stealing something precious from you.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe you\u2019ve told him to stop, only to find he does it in secret. That might strike terror into your heart. Maybe you wish you could just make him stop once and for all.<\/p>\n<p>If he does watch, then why?<\/p>\n<p>Why does he insist on doing something so trashy when he knows that it hurts his wife? Especially if he said he\u2019d stop, or it\u2019s against his religion or his morals.<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_39 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-transparent ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\">Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/#1_How_Can_You_Get_Him_to_Stop\" title=\"How Can You Get Him to Stop?\">How Can You Get Him to Stop?<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/#2_How_Can_He_Possibly_Enjoy_It\" title=\"How Can He Possibly Enjoy It?\">How Can He Possibly Enjoy It?<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/#3_This_is_Proof_that_Youre_Special\" title=\"This is Proof that You\u2019re Special\">This is Proof that You\u2019re Special<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_How_Can_You_Get_Him_to_Stop\"><\/span>1. How Can You Get Him to Stop?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15526 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1.jpg\" alt=\"Trust your husband\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/trust-your-husband-1-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I know for me, whenever I find myself trying to control something my husband does, it\u2019s because I\u2019m telling myself that, if only he would stop doing that thing, I could feel safe or happy or have peace of mind.<\/p>\n<p>But what really wreaks havoc on my peace of mind?<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/podcast\/top-10-ways-to-control-your-husband\/\">Trying to control something I have no control over<\/a>. Like whether my husband watches porn.<\/p>\n<p>Nor would I want to. Well, okay, sometimes I want to control what he does, but not when I\u2019m at my best. I\u2019d rather he could hear his own conscience, which tends to get drowned out by my shrill demands.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not saying porn is right or that it\u2019s okay. But I am saying I know I can\u2019t control it, and that trying to control him seems to make things worse, not better.<\/p>\n<p>I feel more empowered and have a much better experience when I show him that I trust that he\u2019s a good man who makes good decisions.<\/p>\n<div class=\"laura-six-intimacy-skills\" id=\"laura-2782287578\"><blockquote>\n<h3 style=\"display: inline; font-size: 23px;\">Related Article:<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/six-intimacy-skills\/\">The Number One Most Indispensable Skill for Fixing Your Marriage Fast.<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_How_Can_He_Possibly_Enjoy_It\"><\/span>2. How Can He Possibly Enjoy It?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15527 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn.jpg\" alt=\"Men are compelled to watch porn.\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/men-are-compelled-to-watch-porn-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/>Another aspect of being a man, from what I gather, is that porn is incredibly compelling for men. It doesn\u2019t make sense to my female brain, just like the real meaning of <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-respect-your-husband\/\">masculine respect<\/a> seems elusive to me at times also.<\/p>\n<p>One of the best explanations I\u2019ve heard about the male compulsion toward porn was a very light-hearted but profound one from a comedy called Coupling, written by Steve Moffat. At a dinner party in this episode, there is evidence that the British host, also named Steve, was watching a porn film called Lesbian Spank Inferno. And this has come out in the dinner party conversation.<\/p><div class=\"laura-new-roadmap\" id=\"laura-323771675\"><p><a href=\"https:\/\/adoredwifeweekend.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-17022 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Banner-Horizontal-new.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1118\" height=\"559\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Banner-Horizontal-new.png 1118w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Banner-Horizontal-new-150x75.png 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Banner-Horizontal-new-480x240.png 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Banner-Horizontal-new-768x384.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1118px) 100vw, 1118px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>One of the female dinner guests asks, \u201cHow could you possibly enjoy a film like that?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And Steve launches into this explanation:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Oh, because it&#8217;s got naked women in it! Look, I like naked women! I&#8217;m a bloke. We&#8217;re supposed to like naked women\u2014we&#8217;re born like that! We like naked women as soon as we&#8217;re pulled out of one; halfway down the birth canal we&#8217;re already enjoying the view!<\/p>\n<p>Look, it is the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche: We like naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond, because that&#8217;s what being a boy is.<\/p>\n<p>Look, I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of that table there, but that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand more naked bottoms before I die because that&#8217;s what being a bloke is.<\/p>\n<p>When man invented fire, he didn&#8217;t say, &#8220;Hey, let&#8217;s cook!&#8221; He said &#8220;Great! Now we can see naked bottoms in the dark!&#8221; As soon as Caxton had invented the printing press, we were using it to make pictures of\u2014hey!\u2014naked bottoms! We have turned the internet into an enormous international database of naked bottoms.<\/p>\n<p>So you see, the story of male achievement through the ages, feeble though it may have been, has been a story of our struggle to get a better look at your bottoms.<\/p>\n<p>Thank you, girls. I&#8217;m not sure how insulted you really ought to be.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_This_is_Proof_that_Youre_Special\"><\/span>3. This is Proof that You\u2019re Special<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15528 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover.jpg\" alt=\"You are your husband's Lover\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/you-are-his-lover-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>That explanation may be small comfort when you\u2019re feeling scared or jealous that women on your husband\u2019s phone are turning his head.<\/p>\n<p>But it may give you some comfort to remember that while you can\u2019t control what he watches, you can celebrate that, over all the other women in the world, he chose you. He chose you to be his partner, his wife, maybe the mother of his children, the one he wanted to build a life with.<\/p>\n<p>You\u2019re there in his world in three dimensions, and no fleeting, two-dimensional woman can compete with that.<\/p>\n<p>And while you might still wish he wouldn\u2019t go looking for other naked bottoms, it\u2019s nice to remember that your husband is made to be <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/husband-not-attracted-to-me\/\">attracted to your naked bottom<\/a>. It\u2019s part of the crazy, complex, wonderful system that brings couples together.<\/p>\n<p>If you can\u2019t control what your man watches either, what evidence do you have that you\u2019re the most <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/husband-never-does-anything-special-for-me\/\">special woman<\/a> in the world to him?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When you discover that your husband watches porn, it can feel really bad, disrespectful even. Here you\u2019re his only partner in the bedroom, but he\u2019s watching other women do nasty things on his phone. It\u2019s so disappointing, and so revolting. It can also make you feel pretty unspecial knowing that your husband watches an endless\u2026 <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/\">Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15525,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_stopmodifiedupdate":false,"_modified_date":"","content-type":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[716],"tags":[],"app":[],"class_list":["post-15519","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-life-and-physical-intimacy"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Why Does My Husband Watch Porn<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Why Does My Husband Watch Porn\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"When you discover that your husband watches porn, it can feel really bad, disrespectful even. Here you\u2019re his only partner in the bedroom, but he\u2019s watching other women do nasty things on his phone. It\u2019s so disappointing, and so revolting. It can also make you feel pretty unspecial knowing that your husband watches an endless\u2026 Read More &raquo;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Laura Doyle Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-07-04T09:00:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/Why-Does-My-Husband-Watch-Porn.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"628\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Laura Doyle\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"headline\":\"Why Does My Husband Watch Porn\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-07-04T09:00:50+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/\"},\"wordCount\":913,\"commentCount\":13,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/why-does-my-husband-watch-porn\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/Why-Does-My-Husband-Watch-Porn.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Sex Life &amp; 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Here you\u2019re his only partner in the bedroom, but he\u2019s watching other women do nasty things on his phone. It\u2019s so disappointing, and so revolting. 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