{"id":15574,"date":"2023-07-31T22:00:25","date_gmt":"2023-08-01T05:00:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/?p=15574"},"modified":"2023-07-31T02:00:03","modified_gmt":"2023-07-31T09:00:03","slug":"top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/","title":{"rendered":"Top 5 Signs Your Marriage Won&#8217;t Last and How to Rebuild"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>If your marriage is gasping for breath, I don\u2019t need to tell you how painful that is. Or how scary, especially when you think of what\u2019s at stake. Your heart, for one thing, not to mention the life you\u2019ve built together.<\/p>\n<p>When you feel like the end is near and that\u2019s the only option, it\u2019s so disempowering too, like there\u2019s nothing you can do.<\/p>\n<p>But what if there is?<\/p>\n<p>Here are the top signs a marriage won\u2019t last\u2014and 5 empowering alternatives you can put into practice right now if you want to give your marriage a chance.<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_39 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-transparent ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\">Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#1_You_Believe_It_Wont_Last\" title=\"You Believe It Won\u2019t Last\">You Believe It Won\u2019t Last<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#2_Everyone_Around_You_Is_Telling_You_to_Leave\" title=\"Everyone Around You Is Telling You to Leave\">Everyone Around You Is Telling You to Leave<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#3_You_Focus_on_Whats_Wrong_with_Your_Husband\" title=\"You Focus on What\u2019s Wrong with Your Husband\">You Focus on What\u2019s Wrong with Your Husband<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#4_You_Forgot_You_Have_the_Power_to_Make_It_Playful_and_Passionate\" title=\"You Forgot You Have the Power to Make It Playful and Passionate\">You Forgot You Have the Power to Make It Playful and Passionate<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#5_No_One_Ever_Taught_You_The_6_Intimacy_Skills%E2%84%A2\" title=\"No One Ever Taught You The 6 Intimacy Skills\u2122\">No One Ever Taught You The 6 Intimacy Skills\u2122<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_You_Believe_It_Wont_Last\"><\/span>1. You Believe It Won\u2019t Last<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15703 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back.jpg\" alt=\"i want my marriage back\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/i-want-my-marriage-back-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Maybe your husband is saying he\u2019s out and it\u2019s over or he\u2019s more interested in someone else.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s terrifying and painful, and it\u2019s understandable that you\u2019d start to believe it\u2019s not up to you whether your marriage will last.<\/p>\n<p>But that\u2019s just his side of the equation. What about your side? Do you have the desire to stay married?<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s scary to admit that you want your marriage when it seems so hopeless, but having the courage to acknowledge your desire and honor it is powerful.<\/p>\n<p>So the question to ask yourself is not \u201cWill he stay married to me?\u201d but \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/how-to-stop-your-husband-from-divorcing-you\/\">Do I want to stay married?<\/a>\u201d<\/p>\n<div class=\"laura-six-intimacy-skills\" id=\"laura-857828783\"><blockquote>\n<h3 style=\"display: inline; font-size: 23px;\">Related Article:<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/six-intimacy-skills\/\">The Number One Most Indispensable Skill for Fixing Your Marriage Fast.<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_Everyone_Around_You_Is_Telling_You_to_Leave\"><\/span>2. Everyone Around You Is Telling You to Leave<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-15704 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband.jpg\" alt=\"Should I leave my Husband\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/should-i-leave-my-husband-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Maybe when you ask yourself if you want to stay married, your answer is \u201cAre you crazy? This marriage is a complete wreck and I don\u2019t see how it will get any better.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s more than a little discouraging! And as a mere mortal woman, you\u2019re going to need to talk about this with other people, who may also get scared when you tell them what\u2019s going on at your house.<\/p>\n<p>Then, because people love you and want to protect you, they may logically tell you to just leave! They\u2019ll say, \u201cYou deserve better.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Whether it\u2019s your family, your friends or marriage counselors telling you that, it\u2019s likely to scare the stuffing out of you. Especially if they\u2019re all saying it!<\/p><div class=\"laura-new-roadmap\" id=\"laura-2474501018\"><p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<!--HubSpot Call-to-Action Code --><span class=\"hs-cta-wrapper\" id=\"hs-cta-wrapper-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><span class=\"hs-cta-node hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" id=\"hs-cta-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\"><!--[if lte IE 8]>\n\n<div id=\"hs-cta-ie-element\"><\/div>\n\n<![endif]--><a href=\"https:\/\/cta-redirect.hubspot.com\/cta\/redirect\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" ><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"hs-cta-img\" id=\"hs-cta-img-72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969\" style=\"border-width:0px;\" src=\"https:\/\/no-cache.hubspot.com\/cta\/default\/21708589\/72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969.png\"  alt=\"Free Webinar\"\/><\/a><\/span><script charset=\"utf-8\" src=\"https:\/\/js.hscta.net\/cta\/current.js\"><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\"> hbspt.cta.load(21708589, '72e5b617-d76c-41d0-9b4d-efd92801e969', {\"useNewLoader\":\"true\",\"region\":\"na1\"}); <\/script><\/span><!-- end HubSpot Call-to-Action Code -->\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>But does everyone telling you that you should leave him mean that they\u2019re right? Nope! They\u2019re not the experts on your life\u2014you are. They don\u2019t know the reasons, probably good ones, that you chose your man.<\/p>\n<p>This brings me to the third sign that a marriage won\u2019t last\u2026<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_You_Focus_on_Whats_Wrong_with_Your_Husband\"><\/span>3. You Focus on What\u2019s Wrong with Your Husband<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15709\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/reason-you-chose-your-husband.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1080\" height=\"454\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/reason-you-chose-your-husband.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/reason-you-chose-your-husband-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/reason-you-chose-your-husband-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/reason-you-chose-your-husband-768x323.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>You may have forgotten those reasons that you chose him or worry that you made a mistake when you fell for his charm or his great dance moves when now you see that he has anger issues or addictions, or just isn\u2019t interested in family life the way you imagined it would be.<\/p>\n<p>But <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/podcast\/065-what-to-do-if-youre-not-attracted-to-your-husband\/\">what were those reasons you chose your man?<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Just listing ten of them, even if you think they were the wrong reasons, can be a powerful way to change your focus from what you don\u2019t have to what you do have.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4_You_Forgot_You_Have_the_Power_to_Make_It_Playful_and_Passionate\"><\/span>4. You Forgot You Have the Power to Make It Playful and Passionate<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15705\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Power in Relationship\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/power-in-relationship-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Another sign that your marriage won\u2019t last is that y<\/p>\n<p>ou think you\u2019re the victim. That\u2019s what I thought too! Everything was happening to me, so I was stuck having to do all the chores, make all the money, and be the grownup in the marriage while my husband just lounged around watching TV. I was so resentful!<\/p>\n<p>The only way I could see becoming empowered was to dump this husband and get a better one who wouldn\u2019t take advantage of me and make me do everything. And one who was more affectionate too!<\/p>\n<p>But it turns out the person making me do all the dreadful work was not him. It was me!<\/p>\n<p>It was me.<\/p>\n<p>And once <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/self-care-ideas\/\">I discovered my own power to be happy<\/a>, it was incredibly contagious and inspiring. Suddenly our relationship became playful and passionate, right when I realized I had the power to show up as my best self.<\/p>\n<p>Talk about an aha moment! It took me a long time to get my jaw off the floor when I realized how much power I had. Daaaang!<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5_No_One_Ever_Taught_You_The_6_Intimacy_Skills%E2%84%A2\"><\/span>5. No One Ever Taught You The 6 Intimacy Skills\u2122<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-15707\" src=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage.jpg\" alt=\"Another way to save your marrriage\" width=\"1336\" height=\"562\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage.jpg 1336w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage-150x63.jpg 150w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage-480x202.jpg 480w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage-768x323.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/another-way-to-save-your-marriage-1200x505.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1336px) 100vw, 1336px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Back when I was looking for signs that my marriage wouldn\u2019t last, I found what I was looking for. Makes sense when I say it that way now, but I didn\u2019t know that then!<\/p>\n<p>I thought I was being smart and prepared when I looked for that evidence, never that I was cynically creating that outcome because I was so focused on it. I see that so clearly now.<\/p>\n<p>But in my defense, no one had ever taught me the 6 Intimacy Skills. I had no idea there was another way to be besides terrified, vigilant, defensive, and resentful.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe you can relate. I sure hope I\u2019m not the only one because now that I know the 6 Intimacy Skills and practice them and hang around other women who practice them all the time, it seems very obvious that my marriage will last, \u2019til death do us part.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s what I desire, and I\u2019m confident my husband does too. When I look for signs that my marriage will last, I find them abundantly now, like how we were laughing so hard while he chased me around the kitchen island last night. Then he caught me and held me tight. That was so fun!<\/p>\n<p>I much prefer this new habit of looking for signs that my marriage will last, which took some effort at first because I had a habit of looking for signs that it wouldn\u2019t last before. My new habit is a lot more fun and feels as light as breathing now.<\/p>\n<p>So here\u2019s my invitation to you. Instead of looking for the top 5 signs that your marriage won\u2019t last, write down the top 5 signs that your marriage will not only last but also thrive.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe I can help you get started. Just you reading this blog and getting reminded about your power and the 6 Intimacy Skills might be one pretty solid sign that your marriage will last.<\/p>\n<p>Now that\u2019s a sign worth paying attention to.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019d love to hear the signs you find.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If your marriage is gasping for breath, I don\u2019t need to tell you how painful that is. Or how scary, especially when you think of what\u2019s at stake. Your heart, for one thing, not to mention the life you\u2019ve built together. When you feel like the end is near and that\u2019s the only option, it\u2019s\u2026 <a href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/\">Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15702,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_stopmodifiedupdate":false,"_modified_date":"","content-type":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[709],"tags":[],"app":[],"class_list":["post-15574","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-divorce-and-separation"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Top 5 Signs Your Marriage Won&#039;t Last and How to Rebuild<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Here are the top signs a marriage won\u2019t last\u2014and 5 empowering alternatives you can put into practice right now if you want to give your marriage a chance.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Top 5 Signs Your Marriage Won&#039;t Last and How to Rebuild\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Here are the top signs a marriage won\u2019t last\u2014and 5 empowering alternatives you can put into practice right now if you want to give your marriage a chance.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Laura Doyle Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lauradoyle.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-08-01T05:00:25+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/signs-your-marriage-wont-last.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"628\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@lauramdoyle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Laura Doyle\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Laura Doyle\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"headline\":\"Top 5 Signs Your Marriage Won&#8217;t Last and How to Rebuild\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-08-01T05:00:25+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/\"},\"wordCount\":1081,\"commentCount\":3,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/96ba2d9652e0d061581f6148ca656678\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/top-5-signs-your-marriage-wont-last\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/lauradoyle.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/signs-your-marriage-wont-last.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Divorce &amp; 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