005: How to Choose More Intimacy

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For years I truly believed if I could just get my husband to be tidier, more romantic, and more considerate everything would be fine. I told him so, and while that didn’t improve things at all, it did create wall-to-wall hostility and plenty of tension in our home.

For a long time, I didn’t even realize I was controlling. I thought I was just being helpful, acknowledging how I felt, and being honest. Little did I know I was shooting holes in the bucket of our intimacy and absolutely killing any chance of romance.

It wasn’t until I learned to recognize my controlling behavior and make a different choice that the romance returned.

So here’s the choice we all have to make a hundred times a day:

You can choose intimacy or you can choose control but you can’t have both.

If you choose to try to control someone, the intimacy will disappear. If you choose intimacy, you won’t be in control.

Here’s how to choose intimacy:

  • So many women do this without realizing it that hurts their chances of having an intimate relationship.
  • My guest Stephanie was devastated when her husband said he wanted a divorce even though she was pregnant with their fifth child. She didn’t know if she could save her marriage until she discovered something that helped her create a relationship that’s even better than it was before.
  • The Worst Relationship Advice of the Week Award is something you hear absolutely everywhere and most people think of as a fact, but it’s a big, fat lie!
  • How to keep developing yourself to fulfill your dream of having an amazing relationship. You have that desire for a reason: Great relationships are really important.

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