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Selfish Husband: The Cure for the Chronically Self-Consumed Man

Selfish Husband

The Cure for the Chronically Self-Consumed Man

When your husband doesn’t clean up even his part of the mess but just leaves it for you to do or plays video games instead of putting the kids to bed or wants you to notice the yard work he did but never says a word about all the work you do, it can get irritating.

When he makes plans without checking with you, forgets to tell you about them, then disappears when he knew he was supposed to help out with moving the furniture, it can make you resentful.

If your guy sleeps through middle-of-the-night feedings, expects sex whenever he feels like it, and seems to want you to solve all of his problems like the world revolves around him, it’s not only exhausting, it’s lonely.

But there is a solution.

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Stella’s Success Story: Attracting Him Back when He Wanted Out

Stella’s Success Story: Attracting Him Back when He Wanted Out

By Stella McBride

I’d been married to the man of my dreams for 22 years. Our marriage seemed idyllic to others, but the cumulative pain of having the same arguments again and again was overwhelming us both.

On the worst days, when I most wanted him to comfort me, he would avoid me. I would sob in my bed for hours. I was so lonely in my happy-looking home, and so sure he was to blame.

Then, one summer day I found affectionate notes between him and an old girlfriend on a messaging app on our home computer.

I was devastated, he was sorry, and we started counseling.

After a couple of months, it was abundantly clear that verbally bashing each other and bringing up hurt feelings for an hour every other week was doing more harm than good, so we quit.

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Making Up after a Fight

Making Up after a Fight

3 Power Moves to Restore Peace after a Breakdown

If you’re anything like I was, when you fight with your partner you both say nasty things.

It can be shocking to see how low this thing you live with will go.

And while I’ve said some regrettable things during a fight, the biggest thing on my mind when it’s over is that he owes me an apology. Big time!

And it’d better be a good one, to convince me that he’s really sorry and he’ll never do it again.

Until then, I will show that I am waiting for said apology by being distant and having an irritated look on my face.

That ought to motivate him.

But it didn’t. Mostly that approach got me a cold war and wall-to-wall hostility.

It’s stressful. It’s hurtful. Fortunately, I have a better post-fight game plan now.

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How I Changed My Family’s Legacy of Divorce to One of Strong, Happy Marriage

How I Changed My Family’s Legacy of Divorce to One of Strong, Happy Marriage

Carol Beauchemin, Laura Doyle Certified Coach

I come from generations of divorce. It seemed that was to be the destiny of my 26-year marriage as well.

Raising three children, self-employment, financial challenges and stress all put tremendous pressure on my husband and me, and our relationship was beaten down.

I resented the lack of partnership from him and felt very alone raising our children. The economy drop hurt our finances severely, and my fears consumed me—something he didn’t know how to handle.

When I expressed my fear, he heard only criticism and we were off to the races, not understanding one another on any level. I tried to fix things, but my control hurt our marriage and pushed him away. I lacked the tools to navigate these marital challenges.

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How to Talk About Sex

How to Talk about Sex

3 Ways to Keep It Steamy and Get What You Want

If the sex in your relationship isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, you’re not alone.

Women tell me there hasn’t been any physical intimacy since the baby was born–and he’s four.

Or that her husband is always after her for sex, but she just feels used.

Or that she’s tired of feeling so rushed and pressured in the bedroom. She’ll say her husband’s idea of foreplay is to say “Brace yourself.”

Of course these women are frustrated, to say the least. And they’re wondering how things are ever going to improve with so much resentment and hurt standing in the way.

Life is too short to suck it up and suffer through an unsatisfying sex life, but what’s the alternative? How do you talk about it?

After all, talking about sex can feel awkward, and talking during sex can kill the moment.

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Lost the Connection in My Marriage

Lost the Connection in My Marriage

Bonnie Mottram, Laura Doyle Certified Coach

I have been married to my highschool sweetheart for over 30 years. We were pretty happy for the most part but struggled with a small part–the one where I tried to manipulate him into being the way I thought he should be.

We had been dating for nine years before he finally asked me to marry him, so we had children right away. I would tell him how to parent. I often got in the middle of his disciplining them to let him know I disagreed with his punishment, which I did in front of the kids.

I felt I needed to control the money too since he hadn’t learned to manage a bank account in his bachelor days. After complaining that our life plan was not working out, I would demand that we have “a talk.”

This is where I did most of the talking and he would nod, as if he were on the same page agreeing with every word I said about how things needed to be in order to work.

If only he would do what he was supposed to, we would get along just fine, or so I thought. Unfortunately, he didn’t respond in kind.

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Talking about Feelings

Talking about Feelings

5 Communication Myths that Are Ruining Your Relationship

You already know that talking about feelings is the key to having a good relationship with someone you love.

But if you’re anything like I was, sometimes expressing your feelings starts a big fight, leaving you feeling like it’s not safe to share your inner self.

It’s crummy. Here you are revealing your truth and the response you get from the person who’s supposed to love and support you is distance or downright disregard.

There’s no lonelier feeling.

Fortunately, I’ve uncovered some common myths about communicating that were hurting my relationship. Now that I know how to talk about my feelings while increasing the connection with my husband, I want everyone else to know too!

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